I don’t need to change, You do!

For almost everyone, something about the way you have been living has changed in the past months. Maybe its just your routine. Maybe its the people you live with. Maybe you’ve noticed some of your values have changed. Either way something has most likely changed recently. Yes, we don’t like the fact that we’re isolated, but has it forced you to take a look at the areas in your life you need to work on? Has isolation made you appreciate some of the things you do even more? Two different things come to mind for me.

1. Most everyone I know has had to adjust to a new household routine.

My family has been mostly in our house for multiple weeks now. I’m not sure how many but it seems like 6 months. Being in the same confined space has forced us to take a magnified look at how we operate, how we spend our time. But it also gives us a more magnified look at the things we may take for granted.

I’m used to my morning routine, which prior to being quarantined included getting two kids out of the house and around other kids or doing errands. Either way, we all got out of the house almost every morning. We went to find some form of activity. Get back to eat lunch and then wind down before either a nap or some quiet time. I got a little time to get the things I needed to get done and then we continue our afternoon until it was time for dinner. We had our choice of activities for each time period. And then……..that all got thrown out.

My current routine consists of a little learning of some sort or a walk on the trail for a bit in the morning. That’s how I avoid continuously keeping the kids out of the office when dad is on a conference call. After I get through lunch, its time to avoid cleaning while other more conference calls go on and get my other stuff done before kids might wake up. Then to find some source to get remaining energy out before bed.

On the other hand, my husband would say its nice to not have to drive to the office every day. He would also say he misses the people in the office and being able to have collaboration in the office and on his project sites when they now have to largely be phone calls. So. Many. Phone. Calls.

My point? A lot of us have gotten more of a glance into what we both do on a daily basis. Maybe you’ve seen some things you don’t necessarily like and some things you hope will continue as we figure out how to enter back into society.

2. Its seems we’ve all formed some habits or have become aware of some new habits we may want to form, but that takes a lot of time and effort.

Have you formed some habits you with others in your household would adopt? I would say don’t force it but vocalize that you’d like everyone to be supportive of your new habit. When people see the change you make and they feel the ripple effect, maybe they will eventually want to adopt. An idea I’ve heard a lot lately. A lighthouse and a tug boat accomplish the same goal of getting boats in the harbor. The difference? a lighthouse just what it does and boats keep coming in while a tug boat has to get each individual vessel in. Do what you do and others will follow.

How do you react when someone tries to get you on board with something you don’t have any interest in doing? You might get annoyed right? The more they push for you to get on board you might start resenting them? Same for others. They aren’t going to do what you want, let alone be successful at it.

If you find you need to make new habbits, maybe some healthier ones? Try taking some advice from BJ Fogg and his book Tiny Habits. What happens when you want to form a habbit and you fail or it only lasts a day or two because you go all in all at once? Probably doesn’t last real long. What would happen if you start with something so small that it was doable even on the days you were extrememly unmotivated? Like instead of going for a run every morning (the end goal), you got up and put on your shoes and were proud of yourself for doing that? You start with something so small to keep the habit but it wasn’t a big deal if you didn’t actually go for the run every so often.

Going about forming habits is not daunting if you do it the right way. If I’ve peaked your curiosity with a new way, check out his book. Could possibly change the way you do a lot of things (not to mention make it easier).

Either way, things will return back to some form of normal. It certainly won’t be the old for of normal. People have had to get used to working from home if they can. Some aspects are very convenient. We’ll have to find a new routine, form some new habits. Most of all, we’ll have to figure out what our own new normal is. Consider this may be a time to go in some new directions, make new and better habits. Start doing things in a new way. Be the light of good change for those around you so that they may eventually follow.

Published by dreherl

I a Midwest girl. I enjoy spending time with my friends and family. Some hobbies include cooking, reading, and personal development. I love to listen to podcasts. I've always been good at helping people with life advice. I am a wife, mom, sister and daughter. I have two young boys and husband who keep me on my toes. Passions include helping those with self image issues move past them.

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