How do you define success? I’ve come to learn this is a term everyone defines differently. Some would define it as a certain number in their bank account they want to reach. Others define it as having a healthy loving family they are proud of. Some may see it as being able to give back to their community a considerable amount whether that mean time, money, or resources. This brings me to another question, after reach whatever you consider to be success, what next?
When asked this question, i’ve seen a lot of people stumped. They think and say, “well, i’m not sure.” People each have their idea’s they are afraid to go for. They are afraid to take the risk. They say, “what if I fail?” We’ll get to that later. I would ask, “But, what if you succeed?” It seems today so many people are afraid to succeed, they just don’t think of it like that. What if I did this thing and it worked? What if I went for this big goal, and I achieved it? We almost don’t let ourselves think (dream) like this because we don’t want to think of what we could actually do, or the places we could go, the time we could have if we went for it.
The biggest problem, we tend to let that fear take over. We hear that voice in our head of, “yeah, thats too good to be true. you can’t make that happen.” Along with a lifetime of people telling you either you can’t do or have something or you shouldn’t want anything that big, thats greedy. We all have our own dreams and wants, don’t let someone tell you what you can’t do. Is it time you want? Is it an extended amount of time off to travel the world you want? Maybe its to build a big legacy to leave your family or an industry.
Whatever things you want to do, don’t let the voice tell you its too much or you can’t do it. Everyone has a different definition of success. Don’t let other voices make you afraid to be successful and tell you its not possible. It may be cliche to say, “if you can dream it you can do it.” I’ve also found that cliche’s are for a reason, they are true.
If you want to take a trip to Europe, or maybe live there. Think about the house you’d live in and the neighborhood. What restaurants would you visit and take visitors to? If you want to leave a different legacy for your family, think about what it would mean for the next two generations. How would it impact them. Allow yourself to get excited about it. Then, dream about how you could make it happen.
A few steps i’ve come up with to overcome fear of success:
1- define for yourself what success means to you. As mentioned earlier, it doesn’t have to be a bank account number.
2- accept that if you can work to make it happen, you deserve it.
3- keep stomping out those voices that tell you its not possible or not worth it
4- get a plan with smaller milestones that don’t scare you off
5- fear is overcome by action. take action. the more action you take, the more fear will subside
Fear will never go away, its wired into us to keep us from death. We have to be able to step through the fear to get comfortable taking the action. The more you keep fear close and learn how to stomp it out whenever it creeps in (because it always will) the better you’ll get at not letting it stop you from getting the things you want.